Friday, 31 May 2013

May 31

Leave us with a thought that brings you comfort.

Tomorrow is a new day and in many ways a new beginning, because of that I can always tell someone I'm sorry if I hurt them or forgive them if they hurt me. 

Photo of the Day: four things.

Thursday, 30 May 2013

May 30

Where is your most comfortable place to write?

In my chair in front of my computer. Simple easy, I practically live in that chair.

Photo of the Day: Tool

Wednesday, 29 May 2013

May 29

Do you look at your home as a space of comfort?

It is the only place I am truly comfortable, any where else I feel like I'm on display for the masses and I don't like that feeling at all.

Although right now I'm thinking the most comfortable place for me would be by bed, I was up late helping my eldest GD with a school project. I think I've had maybe four hours of sleep if that and I usually need 8-10.

Blogher has published their theme for June and it is Roots... the description mentioned genealogy but I have another thought in my head for that topic, more info to you when I do the update.

Photo of the Day: kiss I don't have one for this so I'll share the one below instead.
The boys hugging

Tuesday, 28 May 2013

May 28

Describe the most comfortable piece of furniture that you own. Right now... I only own a bed and a couple of office chairs that would be even remotely considered comfortable and of them I think it has to be the big office chair that sits in front of my computer, mainly because if it weren't so comfortable I would not be able to sit in it for 8+ hours a day.

Photo of the Day: what you are doing now
 Photo courtesy of Mansanity. If I could find a way this would be me!

Monday, 27 May 2013

May 27

What is the most comfortable room in your house?

My Bedroom- cause it is my home as well, I have my computer and a small kitchenette and all my worldly possessions all in this one small room. It is cool when I want to be cool and warm when I want to be warm.

Photo of the Day: Can't live without... that's easy that would be a photo of my computer.

Sunday, 26 May 2013

May 26 - Sunday Thoughts

I have been trying to come up with a theme for June but I am stuck. I will be using the Blogher prompts of course but I always try to have a theme that is uniquely me.  I even checked the June events calendar to see if there were any special week or monthly events that might appeal to me. I found a few like clay week and rose month but I don't know how I would work them. Actually as I was writing that I realized I could take a page from the Author of 52 Projects. Which is a book I used to have but can't find today.

A rose for every day for 30 days in what ever medium was handy on that day from crayons to clay and everything inbetween, I think that would be a good idea but I am still undecided

Photo of the Day: Fav thing to do on Sunday

Saturday, 25 May 2013

May 25

Last weekend we celebrated Victoria Day but in truth it should have been this weekend as in my mind it is literally associated with May 24th. In my youth it was this week-end that everyone came to town for the first visit of the year. They were here to open their cottages and their trailers and have their first summer week end mind you back then summer began earlier at least it seemed to.

In my 50+ years I have seen many changes and any of you born in the mid 1900's know what I mean. The pace of life was slow and easy but every year it seems to me life goes faster an faster.  In my youth we strived to live now it seems we live to strive. Push harder, go faster, do more in less time, Why?

You were expected to work hard but not to work yourself to death. People waited anxiously for letters from their far off loved ones, now we get so much electronic mail that we delete 3/4 of it unread, at least I do. News came slowly vis tv or radio now 10 minutes after something happens someone has posted it to the world wide web.

Do not get me wrong I love the internet and many of the options it offers us are great. The Internet allows me to be what I want to be without spending a lot of money but it also offers the same options to rapist and kiddie porn dealers. Still in all the world only one thing remains true, all that is good can and will be balanced with all that is bad because we as a species would most likely get bored if everything was all bad or all good all the time. We as a species need a balance of both good and bad in our lives to feel like we have lived them. 

Be good to one another as often as you can but if someone is making trouble for you eventually that trouble has to be addressed preferably not by violence but in some way.


Photo of the Day: Us

Friday, 24 May 2013

May 24 Happy Victoria Day

What is your biggest motivation for leaving your comfort zone? Any one of the people in this photo could cause me to step outside my comfort zone if they needed my help.  You are familiar with most of the people in this photo but I would like to introduce you to the others.

In the back starting from the far left is my DIL Ashley, Sara's Dad Sam,  my oldest grand-child Sara, My son Myles and my other half Rob
In the middle beside me is my grand-daughter Breanna
In the front there is my daughter Faith with her oldest son Drake, my SIL Dean and the youngest boy Aidan.
Scarlett my youngest grand-daughter is not much more than a gleam in her mothers eyes here.

Christmas 2011
My Family!


Photo of the Day: Go

Thursday, 23 May 2013

May 23

How do you make yourself feel comfortable when you're far from home?

I always have my laptop with is my link with everything and once I open it and am immersed in my writing or what ever else I need to do I am fine. For those times when there is no electricity I use my tablet and read or play a game.


Photo of the Day: PJ's I have no photo's of PJ's, I don't wear them but I got thinking if I did wear PJ's what would I like them to look like so I went surfing and this is what I found:


Though if I had a choice I'd rather wear one of these

Wednesday, 22 May 2013

May 22

Do you do your best work when you're feeling comfortable or when you're feeling a little uncertain?

I have never thought about it, I suppose when I feel a little uncertain because then I want to make it as nice as possible, if I were comfortable it would be a mumbly, jumbly mess like my journal.


Photo of the Day: Change

I was just thinking about this last night. A dozen years in October since our friends got married and a dozen years since things were really good between the Professor and I


A dozen years has changed my face a lot and my body too. It hurts sometimes to look at myself as I am now and know that I have done this to myself. What's more I have done it willingly.

Tuesday, 21 May 2013

May 21

When was the last time you did something that made you uncomfortable but was ultimately worth fighting through those feelings?

Not for a very long time, in fact not since I went to Toastmasters back in 05. I remember feeling very nervous when ever I went to a meeting at the beginning but then I was fine. I learned a lot about public speaking through them and would love to go back I just can't seem to get there.

Photo of the Day: I Care About This...

I only care about one thing and I'm sure by now you are tired of seeing pictures of my family so no photo from me today.

I just realized why my post didn't post yesterday, Yesterday was a Holiday Monday, What we call May 2-4 weekend and I was just checking my list of pending posts and saw that I had done the May 24th one by mistake so I did try to post, it was just the wrong date.

Monday, 20 May 2013

May 20

How much do you push yourself to leave your comfort zone?

I don't really, its called a comfort zone for a reason and I like it here.

I can't believe it after 2.5 months never missing a day on this blog I actually missed today ah well I'm sending it out now.

Photo of the Day:Light
Victoria Day Fireworks

Sunday, 19 May 2013

May 19 - Sunday Thoughts

Photo of the Day: Favorite view

A picture of my daughter with her kids. This is my favorite view!

Saturday, 18 May 2013

May 18

Photo of the Day: Want

I want many things but the one thing I want the most is a little house at the edge of a wood like the grandmother in Red Riding Hood and like my own grandmother many years ago.

Friday, 17 May 2013

May 17

Do you carry tissues on you? Have you been known to give them to strangers you see in distress?

Yes almost always, and no I haven't except to the odd mom with a stuffed up or weepy child.

Thursday, 16 May 2013

May 16

What do you do to give comfort to others?

 I give hugs both real and virtual to everyone I talk to that will allow it, I listen when someone needs to talk and often that is all they need.

Wednesday, 15 May 2013

May 15

Frank Clark said: "We find comfort among those who agree with us - growth among those who don't." Agree or disagree?

Monday, 13 May 2013

May 13

If you had to be trapped in an elevator, which friend would you want trapped with you and why?

Since I do not have any friends except my sister these days I suppose I would have to say her. We get along well since we both have low-key personalities and we talk a lot about different things. Plus neither of us is driven to talk all the time, we are content to sit side by side and read a book. She has a sharp memory and for years I relied on it to remember the things I forgot. I am not sure what she gets from me other than acceptance and someone who shares her sense of humour. I also try to encourage her to follow her dreams which I'm not sure others do.

Photo prompt: Sunrise/Sunset

I missed sunrise so I will get a photo of sunset and upload it.

Sunday, 12 May 2013

May 12 - Sunday Thoughts- Happy Mother's Day!

I feel so bad because I haven't been much fun this past week. Today is the reason. My mother died a long time ago but  Mother's day always makes me sad., My parents anniversary falls on May 15 and that adds to the sad.  My grandson's birthday on the 14th gets buried under the sad. He is only turning three so perhaps I haven't had time to make the transition yet, bullshit of course I've had time I'm just too wrapped up in the sad.

These are my parents on their wedding day! The photo prompt of the day is Mother so this fits well.

This is me, my daughter with my sisters Cindy and Sandy . We are all mothers. My sisters and I each have two children , my daughter has birthed four, three of which are alive and kicking

Happy Mother's Day Girls!

Saturday, 11 May 2013

May 11

I have a lot to say but this is not the place I want to share it, suffice it to say my mood is deep sadness.

Photo of the Day: a Smile

so sad am I that I can't even make myself look for a smile today. I will add one tomorrow.

Friday, 10 May 2013

May 10

Do you have days when you just curl up and sleep because you are feeling overwhelmed? My day is only two hours old and I am so exhausted that all I want to do is sleep. Even the thought of the professor coming today is not brightening the day or me up. I am so weary... part of that is the fact that I'm missing some of my meds but I can't help feeling there is more to it than that. Whatever it is I need to take some time and deal with it.

Photo of the Day: Stars

How about one star? My GD the Pop Princess! Scrapbook page I made of my GD showing off a Christmas Present a few years back.

A Star

Thursday, 9 May 2013

May 9

What song do you play to bring yourself comfort?

These boots were Made for Walking my Nancy Sinatra! I put a link below that will take you to a Youtube version. I need to remind myself how to add a video to a blog entry but for now a link will have to do.

Version 1

Every time I'm down I'll play it to remind myself that I can walk away from  something if it just doesn't work for me. It has given me the courage more than once to make a change in my circumstances because they were untenable. There are others of course for other moods but this is the one I turn to when I need to know I'm only as stuck as I want to be.

Photo of the Day: A snack
Way I figure it I have two choices here repeat a picture I've already used or take one and add it. Since I really hate to repeat myself I'll be back as soon as I take it and upload it.

Peanut butter and crackers are the best snack I know and it is fast & easy

Wednesday, 8 May 2013

May 8

Do certain smells make you feel instantly comfortable?

The smell of any kind of baking always makes me happy but I suppose the one that would make me the most comfortable would be the smell of baking bread because my mom used to make a loaf every couple of days, it was cheaper than buying bread for her.

Photo of the day: Shape: This is a painting my grand-daughter did for me a couple of years ago. She started with the ying-yang shape and the added other shapes to create this interesting mandala for me in my favourite colours. It isn't quite perfectly balanced but I didn't care she made it for me!

Tuesday, 7 May 2013

May 7

What makes you reach for a comfort food?

Any number of things can have me reaching out for sugar or salt or a combination of the two but mainly it happens when I am feeling very depressed or when I just can't find the energy to go on and I figure a bite of something full of calories will help boost my energy, turns out that doesn't happen most times it just makes me more tired. 

Sometimes when I'm really stressing about something and I have run out of fingernails to chew I'll grab what ever is handy. Ussually since I'm too worried to cook that means cookies or ice cream or something equaly as easy to grab and go.

Todays Photo Prompt is something beginning with F

I was trying to get a picture of that stone he was holding but his fingers kept getting in the way as he was telling me about it.

Monday, 6 May 2013

May 6 Mental Health Awareness Month

Sometimes it takes a stranger to awaken dormant thoughts and remind us that we are not alone with our problems mental or physical. Online we have little problem discussing our various ills yet within our family and friends we say little. A recent acquaintance of mine Chris Dean has just received her diagnosis and as I was reading what she had to say I remembered how I had felt when I received mine. It was nice to have a name to give something I had lived with my whole life but it also upset me that there was an actual name for what I had.

I spent a good part of the day trying to chase down where I wrote my reaction to the news that I had Dysthymia and I can't find it so I must assume it is in one of my written journals not one of the online ones. Since the beginning of this year I have not visited my other journals. However if you would like to see what it feels like to have Dysthymia and not know what it is you can read a few of the posts here

Todays photo prompt is broken. Because of the search I did not take a photo today however there are a couple of drawing I would like to share.
Depression gets in the way of life

Me in deep depression
It surrounds you and saps all of the colour from the world. Both of these are things I created several years before I got put on medication. The self you see in the second photo was the only self I had at that time. She had no energy, did not see the world beyond her own personal dungeon and didn't care that she didn't. She is too much of a coward to commit a quick suicide so she was, (and still is), killing herelf a pound at a time.

The medication can only take you so far, talk therapy should be my next step but I have tried to begin the process several times and it always ends the same, I stop fighting and just let the depression take over. I do not fight it, because I do not want to fight it. I do not want it gone, it is so much a part of me that I do not know what I would do without it. That I am able to recognize this and accept it as the way things should be may be a surprise to some of you but  I am not stupid just unwilling to fight.

Sunday, 5 May 2013

May 5th Happy Cinco De Mayo

It originated with Mexican-American communities in the American West as a way to commemorate the cause of freedom and democracy during the first years of the American Civil War,[8][9] and today the date is observed in the United States as a celebration of Mexican heritage and pride.

The photo of the day is about paper so while this isn`t my picture my grandson and I agree if we were to celebrate Cinco De Mayo we would do it with this. I love those plates.

Saturday, 4 May 2013

May 4th

I have come to the realization that I really need to finish the risk calendar and then follow the program myself. Today I set myself an easy task for myself, volunteer for one hour at a craft show at the local library. Since I like craft shows and the library you would think the combination would be hard to beat and it was only for an hour. All I needed to do was make sure people were signing in and getting raffle tickets, simple for most people, for me not so much. Last night I started feeling afraid and while I tried to talk myself into still going and doing it, this morning I wrote an email telling them I would not be there. My head feels like it is stuffed with cotton wool and my body feels like it weights a ton. I know this is depression and that I could fight it if I chose but honestly it is just too much effort today. This is the war I fight nearly every day, were it not for Coco and my family I would probably sleep far more than I do now, just cause that is all I really feel like doing. I have my good days of course but this week I've been off nearly every day, its like some robot who knows what to do has taken over my body and left my mind whirling and stifled at the same time.

Photo of the day: In my cup is coffee, two sugars and two milk.

Double Double Coffee
And a look at a small section of my messy desk!

Friday, 3 May 2013

April Round-up

I think I may make this a regular thing as it helps me keep a record of things that happened during the month

First of all the scoring. This was the plan:
 I am trying something new this month:
1 point x 30 daily blog entries
1 point x  20 daily prompts answered
1 point x  30 poems completed in the form listed for that day
1 point  x 20 if the daily poetry form answers prompt 
Today is the 30th day and these are my scores:
 1 point x 30 daily blog entries = 30
 1 point x  20 prompts answered = 18
 1 point x  30 poems in the form = 19
 1 point  x 20 if the form & prompt matched = 13

for a total of  80 out of 100 points. Not bad if I do say so myself, especially given just how busy this month has been for me.

Here is a look at my month:

May 3rd

Which would you rather have: a super-soft pillow or a warm, fuzzy blanket?

My warm fuzzy blanket! 
micro-fleece, light and warm!

May 3 Photo of the day:
Jackass Corn Biscuits mmm with just a touch of ginger
I love these things! They are corn gingersnaps which makes them better for you than the regular ones and if you like ginger you will like these. I get them from a Caribbean grocer I know in Mississauga. (Ontario, Canada in case you don't know the city name). These and Ginger Beer syrup is why I go see him.

Thursday, 2 May 2013

May 2nd

Do you still sleep with a stuffed animal now?

Yes I do, right now a big momma tiger & baby share my bed, it used to be foghorn leghorn but he got lost along the way  I have only recently found him again. Still I like the tiger so it stays.
Momma & baby, my bed companions
My morning routine at present consists of:

Getting dressed
taking Coco for her morning constitutional, feed her and Ember
making and drinking a couple of coffee's sometimes perked sometime Tassimo depending on what we have while catching up on farmville
at 9am ususally I am at working on one of my lessons and around 10:30am I will come and do this entry.


Tomorrow my routine will change because my SIL has started work and his shift begins early
At 7 am I will get up to the alarm and get dressed
At 7:15 I will take Coco out for her walk
At 7:30 I will feed her and Ember, grab a coffee and breakfast if possible
At 7:45 I will do a quick run through Farmville
At 8:am I will check email at writing .com
At 8:15 I will put on my shoes and head out to the bus stop with the boys
my daughter and I will take the boys to day care and then come back home I figure I'll be back home by 10am at which time I will do todays blog entry
10:30 or so I will be back at doing my lessons until noon when I will take my lunch break and check farmville again
Back at it by 1pm

Wednesday, 1 May 2013

May 1st

Did you have a favourite stuffed animal or lovey as a child?  Tell us about it.

As a child I had very few toys since we were very poor. The first toy I remember wanting was a Raggedy Anne and the first toy I remember getting was a Wendy Walker. The one thing I remember about the Wendy Walker was that she was taller than me. 

For the photo stuff I thought I would follow along with this one by Fat Mum Slim she does a new one every month but as luck would have it my camera needs a battery charge and I didn't bring my charger to the Professors. Turns out internal DCIM takes tons more power than an external one even when your just transferring photos from one to the other.

When I get home I'll have to put up a verbal description until I can take the photos

Today the item I was going to photograph was my new runners. They are black with reddish purple trim and purple laces. They are low tops not high tops since I do a lot of walking and the high tops hurt my ankles, (shakes head, no idea), and I find them uncomfortable.
I was going to photograph my shoes but I thought I would share this for todays photo prompt. I bought this kitchenette set last year with my inheritance, it allows me a certain flexibility such as being able to make my own meals if I so desire on the days I do not want to spend with my daughter & her family. There is a hot plate, a fridge, a freezer a electric kettle, a microwave and a toaster oven all in this small corner of my room.