Saturday, 1 June 2013

June 1

Photo of The Day: B is for…: Bride  and  Boat!
My darling daughter is getting married in June of 2014 on a boat! We finalized the venue yesterday. Here in a picture of my daughter in her first wedding dress (we changed it cause she didn't like the way it looked, I thought she looked great!) and a promo picture of the boat cause I forgot to take my camera with me yesterday.

Re-evaluate one long held belief each day: Because this is the first day I figured I'd start with a list of my longest held beliefs about myself. Since negatives are the easiest things to find most of these will be negatives I'm sure.

1) I am clumsy and break everything I touch
2) I am worthless because I am a girl and girls can't do anything.
3) Poor as dirt and twice as ugly
4) No one is nice just to be nice, they always want something in return
5) Your family are the only people you can trust to have your back
6) Being fat is something to be ashamed of because the only reason you could possibly be fat is if you are a lazy person
7) If you can't eat off your floors your house isn't clean
8) Don't complain, you have a roof over your head, food to eat and clothes to wear that is more than a lot of other people have.
9) What happens at home stays at home, we don't air our dirty laundry in public
10) You should have a job, there is no excuse for not working except laziness
11) My depression makes it impossible for me to have any kind of life outside my own four walls
12) The world is a dangerous place and I am safer here.
13) I can't do anything right
14) No one would miss me if I were gone.
15) I am beyond all human and spiritual help, I will end my days as this broken person and I can't do anything about it.

I’m such a loser. I can’t get it together. I’m always caving and binging and shooting myself in the foot. I start out OK and then in no time everything falls apart. I’m so ashamed of the way I look and live. This is all my fault. I feel hopeless.” 

Hows that for a list of negativity? Some of them are in third person because that is the way I hear them in my head my guess is that sometime in my life someone said those things to me.

There are two other things on my list to discuss in these posts but I am beginning to wonder if dealing with this one just might take a lot more of me that I expected.

Take a moment each day to practice self compassion and self-love: 

Self-compassion means treating oneself with kindness and support when things don’t go well.

I have made mistakes, but they are not the end of the world, I can and will do better in the future.


“I commit to do my best to do something loving for myself, however big or small, for the next 31 days.”

signed: Cheryl Marois

Welcome to my take on Roots!

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